I don't need rest. I need another project.

It's been a while since I've heard anyone use the term "workaholic." I tend not to define my life by the work I do, and I don't feel I suffer from workaholism at all. But I've diagnosed myself with another condition entirely, one we can call "hobbyholic." You know how it goes.

You wake up, eat breakfast, and dive into work, either at an office where you'd rather not spend eight precious hours, or in your home office. Then, while you're working, the ideas start coming. They hit you in the shower, on your commute, during meetings. And after those long working hours, instead of resting, you're ready to "work" on your own projects and ideas.

Here's the thing though. It doesn't feel like work at all. You love these things. You start building that app to solve a problem that a simple Excel sheet would handle just fine, or you spend more time perfecting the solution than you ever spent dealing with the original problem.

But that feeling of bringing your ideas to life is addictive. You look at another project and think, I can do better. And then this condition begins to evolve. You find yourself thinking about your projects in the shower, at the office, during meetings. Sometimes even while you sleep.

Months pass. You reach a point where you're exhausted by your day job, but you're also tired of your own projects. The things that once energized you now feel like obligations. Your hobbies have become another job, except this one doesn't pay and has no boundaries. It's just... burnout, again.

Then you decide to stop, but you don't know what to do with yourself. You sit on the couch and your hands feel restless. You open your phone and scroll mindlessly because at least that's something. You've forgotten how to simply exist without a project demanding your attention.

The good news is that I've finally found the cure. I'm learning "doing absolutely nothing." I'm already researching techniques, hours of youtube videos. I'm thinking about starting a journal about it. Maybe track it somehow? I could make a spreadsheet, or wait, maybe build an app to help others do the same? Wait. No. This is happening again, isn't it?